Questions are like sunlight; they reveal the beauty in the people around us.

Questions are like sunlight; they reveal the beauty in the people around us. I grew up in Central Arizona. While not the austere desert views with tumbleweeds skittering across the landscape most attribute to Arizona, our sparse, low scrub juniper trees allowed my eyes to be calibrated looking to the far horizon.

In those long views, I could watch a thunderstorm form, expend itself, and dissipate without ever getting wet. Three decades ago, the military and work brought me to the claustrophobic, tree-filled East Coast, where it feels like one looks to the sky through a soda straw.

Driving south on I-95 into Baltimore, there is a bend in the highway where the road rises above the green trees and buildings and offers a long view to the horizon. It was then that I noticed the staggering size and beauty of the cumulonimbus clouds towering somewhere over the Chesapeake Bay. The setting sun highlighted interior caverns, while pink and orange edges contrasted against the blue sky.

As I took in the sight and reflected on the beauty, I understood that it was the light revealing the natural form of the cloud. If not for the sun's light, the clouds would have gone unnoticed as just another drab cotton ball tumbling across the sky. Then the insight struck: the clouds are like the people around us; in the right light, they are beautiful, and questions can be a means of light to draw out that beauty.

Under harsh, bright criticism and judgment, beauty withers. Under the cover of darkness and neglect, there is no hope for discovering the timid nuances of beauty. The maxim "Everyone is fighting a battle you know nothing about" captures the moment we can intentionally choose to explore the subtleties of those we sit with knee-to-knee, or ask for the latest sales numbers. Leaders at every level have the opportunity curiosity offers as we explore the many angles and facets of those we work alongside.

I have walked miles to have conversations, and thought much about the questions we use to listen and understand one another. Author and researcher, Brené Brown wrote, "People are hard to hate close up. Move in." The questions we choose at any given moment are a choice to pursue the beauty and humanity of others. But it is a choice. Advanced interrogation techniques are not required in our daily lives.

The throwaway question, "how are you," murmured as you pass in the hall, can be transformed with genuine curiosity and intention. Some questions are more effective than others, and crafting a meaningful question is a learnable skill, but intention and curiosity can cover a multitude of errors. The algorithms and talking heads profit from your hatred of others. Leaning in with the generous heart of golden hour light to understand the beautiful nuance of others is an act of both love and resistance.

What are your go-to questions you use to truly connect with colleagues?