"The closer you become with these people while you're wearing that mask, the more distant you actually feel from the people around you." - Garrett Wood
"The closer you become with these people while you're wearing that mask, the more distant you actually feel from the people around you." - Garrett Wood
In this episode of Curated Questions, host Ken Woodward engages in a deep conversation with Garrett Wood, a national board-certified health and wellness coach and certified clinical hypnotherapist. Garrett shares his insights on the hidden tolls of high achievement, addressing issues such as perfectionism, imposter syndrome, and burnout. He explores the power of questions and how they can transform our understanding of identity, worth, and achievement.
The discussion dives into the paradox of wearing masks to gain social acceptance, the first signs of burnout manifesting as cynicism, and the importance of creating authentic connections. Garrett also discusses practical strategies, such as non-sleep deep rest, to enhance performance and creativity, as well as the role of self-compassion in maintaining mental health.
This episode offers valuable perspectives on how to navigate and make sense of the world through the power of questioning.
This Curated Questions episode can be found on all major platforms and at CuratedQuestions.com.
Keep questioning!
Episode Notes
00:00 The Mask of Perfectionism
01:11 Welcome to Curated Questions
01:55 Meet Garrett Wood
02:57 Garrett's Early Experiences with Questions
05:14 The Power and Danger of Questions
06:02 Socratic Method and Questioning Authority
08:50 Curiosity and Childhood
12:32 The Role of Questions in Executive Coaching
15:13 Creating a Safe Space for Growth
20:22 Helping Clients Trust The Process
32:02 The Therapeutic Relationship
34:22 Understanding Pain and Healing
38:17 Non-Sleep Deep Rest
46:55 The Mundane Tasks and Mind Wandering
47:39 Non-Sleep Deep Rest Explained
48:29 The Power of Journaling
51:25 Practical Applications of Non-Sleep Deep Rest
54:20 Recognizing and Addressing Burnout
56:08 The Importance of Biofeedback
56:58 Understanding and Identifying Cynicism
01:01:43 The Concept of Masking
01:06:36 Living Authentically
01:11:30 The Journey of Self-Discovery
01:13:56 The Role of Questions in Personal Growth
01:20:48 Exploring Identity and Attachment
01:29:31 Final Thoughts and Takeaways
Resources Mentioned
Explain Pain Theory by David Butler and Lorimer Moseley
Five Levels of Attachment by Don Miguel Ruiz Jr.
Garrett Wood on LinkedIn at Gnosis Therapy
Questions Asked
When did you first understand the power of questions?
Did God really say that? Did he really say that to you that you could eat any of 'em except this one? Are you sure that that's what he said?
What was the next step on that journey?
How do you know this is true?
What is this?
Why is the sky blue?
What is grass green?
How is this happening?
What's going on?
Why do you do that?
Why are we not allowed to do this?
Are they good or bad?
Were you a curious kid?
Were there any particular books or authors, it doesn't have to be a favorite, but just one that perhaps inspired more questions as you reflect back now?
What's the answer to life universe and everything?
What role do you think braver questions play in reexamining our narratives around worth achievement and authenticity?
Can we get this nervous system into like a more regulated state? Can we get back inside of your window of tolerance?
How do you know that? Why is that true? When did you first come to believe that? Is there any situations where that doesn't work?
How do you know that that's true? What's the evidence that leads you to believe that to be the only way? And is there exceptions to that?
Do I go with the flow or do I say what I know to be true?
It's obvious to me why is it not to everybody else?
How do you help folks in those initial conversations or those in at the beginning to have confidence in the process?
Am I missing something?
What am I missing?
What is the difference between those two words?
Have you found any particular go-to questions in helping folks?
Have you ever felt like that before?
What is similar or different about the situation you're in now that you were, when you felt that before?
What did you do then that got you out of that scenario?
What worked for you?
What other resources did they have then that worked that were important for them?
What made them feel safe or what did they need to feel like they could step forward no matter what?
Is that kind of one of your primary roles then as you're starting out and talking with folks is just creating that safest space?
How do you operationalize that if you're going to be going in for surgery?
What actually happens when we do that practice?
How have you seen this practice positively impact folks?
How far were we off by?
How would you describe the attuned to those around us?
Where did we leave off with the Q2 projections?
Can you provide a little bit more of a definition for that and then, and we can explore or spend a little bit of time exploring that?
So the path towards that reconciliation looks like what?
How do you start to make folks aware or how, how do you help folks increase their awareness about what the body is actually saying?
How do we do that intentionally and preemptively rather than, you know, when that check engine light comes on?
What does that look like?
How, how have you, whether it's an example or just how have you seen this practice positively impact folks?
So is that, is that kind of the right path that I'm going down as far as how this works?
How can questions make that even more effective?
Can we use that as a tool for that?
Can we use that for creativity and can we prime that with like, questions going in such that we hope that there's, we're, we're going to productionize the rest so that, uh, okay?
Is there a keep going here?
Is there a best practice of having a notebook nearby when you come out of this?
Did I not get enough sleep last night? When was the last time I had some food or some protein?
How easy is it for me to access self-compassion?
Where is the safest place to put it down? How long can you keep it off for? How much of your authentic self can you bring into it?
What's happening?
Can I be myself and be with other people? Can I be authentically myself, the parts I appreciate about myself, and be around other people who actually appreciate me for those things that I appreciate?
What are other pockets of life where you've found an appreciation for questions, whether this is work, personal?
What is left? What do we know? What is still helpful?
How does this belief serve me? What part of this behavior is helpful and what part's harmful? Is there something that I could do differently, such that might get me more of the good and less of the bad?
How do you think about questions and identity?
How is that me? In what sense am I also them? What are the things that brought me joy and contentment at 5, 10, 15, 20, 25, 40, 50? Is there something that they all have in common? What also has changed? What was adaptive then and protective then that's no longer adaptive or protective?
Who am I now if I'm never able to be that thing I wanted to be, that I planned on being my whole life?
Who am I without that?
What is similar between all the versions of you? What is different? Who are you if you're not these titles or these positions?
Are there any elements of questions that we hadn't touched on that there's still some nuggets to mine?
Why? Why would that happen to me? How did that have to happen? Why me?
What is your right now question? What are the questions that you're working with today?
Is the myth that we've all been told that sacrificing in the pursuit of success is like required for it. Is that a myth?
Can we question that myth?
Can we instead turn that myth on its head and say, you know, sustainable success is actually built through your wellbeing, not at its expense?
Is there more evidence to suggest that that is actually true versus the other one?
What are the beliefs, ideas, or experiences we have personally and professionally to make one of those conclusions and which one feels more authentic or genuine, in the long run? Is it more helpful or hurtful for them to believe one or the other?
How, what does that exploration look like?
What does that mean that I do this week? What does that make my week look like? What's the same between those two beliefs? What's different? What different practices do I bring in?
What do I choose to believe?
Where's the best place for folks to track you down to see the things that you're excited about and, um, and to follow along?
What belief system that got you to where you are today might be the very thing limiting where you can go tomorrow?
When did you last feel genuine compassion for a colleague who annoyed you, and what does your answer reveal about your current state?
Where in your life are you being loved for a performance rather than your presence, and what is that costing you?
What if the most difficult person in your life is actually the most frightened, and how would that change your next interaction with them?