#106 Ken Woodward: What Would You Do If You Were Me?

"I sat there with them and realized I had no story to trade. Not a faded one. None." - Ken Woodward

With the election less than two weeks away, I caught myself asking how those knuckleheads could vote that way. Underneath it: I would never do that if I were them.

It starts with an observation from Jason Pargin about a particular question that is often misinterpreted and a couple others that sound alike. What would you do? What would you do in my shoes? What would you do if you were me?

I tell the story of my turn from straight-ticket Republican to bright blue, and the six months in 2016 when new friendships showed me how little I understood about lives I thought resembled mine.

Drawing on Melissa Harris-Perry’s Sister Citizen, Thomas Nagel’s idea of moral luck, and research on deep canvassing, I ask how much credit I can take for changing, and what I owe the people who pay for a vote.

It closes with sonder and a question: What don’t I know about the life behind this choice?

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#105 Ken Woodward: The Question After the Aha!

"A statement claims to be finished, and that claim is exactly what time comes back to audit. A question never claimed to be finished." - Ken Woodward

Some ideas arrive like lightning. Others crawl. In 2016, one of my slowest ideas began with a turtle in John Steinbeck’s The Grapes of Wrath. Ten years later, it’s still walking.

This episode explores a new study on the “Aha! glow.” Professional writers and physicists logged their most creative ideas, then rated them again six months later. The physicists’ flashes of insight held up. The writers’ faded. The quiet ideas grew in both groups.

I revisit my year of daily questions, where the statements aged and the questions didn’t. I also return to Hank, an 85-year-old I nearly walked past during my walk of every street in DC, because I’d already decided he had little to say.

Along the way: submarine navigation, the cocked hat, and why one bearing is never a fix.

The question I’m carrying: What answer am I trusting because of how it felt when it arrived?

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#104 Still Sharp: Lulu Miller on the Questions We Stop Asking

" Real curiosity, untethered, unsoftened, it's a pretty intense tool. And I think the kids haven't blunted the weapon by politeness or by fear of looking dumb or by the belief that there are certain things we should know. It's still sharp." - Lulu Miller

Lulu Miller first found the power of questions on a subway train, listening to an early Radiolab episode about fireflies that blink in unison. That question opened a door she had been looking for since childhood: another world, inside this one. Today she co-hosts Radiolab with Latif Nasser, co-founded Invisibilia, and created Terrestrials, a nature podcast for kids and families.

Her international bestseller, Why Fish Don't Exist, begins with a question many of us carry quietly: what is the point? Her answer reminds us that the categories we trust are often questions we stop asking.

But the power scared her. She once fled journalism for a fiction MFA, convinced her questions could hurt people. Jad Abumrad's reframe brought her back: those worries are the sound of your moral compass.

In this conversation, Lulu shares three ways to move a conversation past the rehearsed version: ask something tactile, ask the elephant-in-the-room question, and interrupt with care. Then the kids on Terrestrials take over, asking NASA scientists and the poet laureate the blunt, open questions adults soften away. Real curiosity, unsoftened, is still sharp.

Who blunted ours?

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#103 Ken Woodward: The People Who Leave Get the Last Word: Revisiting a Question Ten Years Later

"What do former members say about the organization?" - Ken Woodward

Ten years ago today, I asked a question on my daily practice, IOTD365: what do former members say about an organization? I wrote it after my daughter gave up on an internship. One conversation in a hallway with a senior who'd done it was all it took.

In 2016 I read that question as an insider asking leaders to listen. Today I read it as a former member who left federal service after thirty-two years without anyone asking what I knew. I also read it as a founder who can't hear what's said after I leave the room.

In this episode, I reread the original post and question the man who wrote it. I look at where reputation really lives and the courage it takes to tell someone the truth. Then I borrow a habit from my years navigating submarines in and out of port. Taking a fix on an old question shows how far I've moved.

What question did you answer years ago that deserves a second look?

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#102 Ken Woodward: The Questions That Make You Nod: How Agreement Hides Assumptions

"Disagreement makes the map visible. Agreement lets it pass for the terrain." - Ken Woodward

"Thank you for your service" arrives with a script already written. A World War II veteran taught Ken Woodward a better reply: "You were worth it." That exchange opens a solo episode about the worlds hidden inside the questions we answer.

Ken starts with a single verb that put broken glass on a road where there was none, then turns to survey research showing how answer choices define normal, and to philosopher R.G. Collingwood's idea that every question stands on assumptions. From there he returns to the streets of Washington, D.C., sorting the questions strangers asked his "Black and Brown Lives Matter" sign by the maps they carried, including the ones pointing back at the sign itself.

The hardest case comes last: a question Ken agreed with, never examined, and what his nod cost the conversation. Disagreement makes the map visible. Agreement lets it pass for the terrain.

What world did you agree to before you answered?

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#99 Wanda Herndon: What Are They Really Asking? | Former Starbucks SVP on the Second Question

" I had to start trying to think beneath the questions: what are they really saying?" - Wanda J. Herndon

Wanda J. Herndon trained as a journalist, then spent forty years on the other side of the notebook. Dow. DuPont. Eleven years as Starbucks SVP of Global Communications while the company grew from 550 stores to more than 11,000.

Her curiosity starts with a middle child in Flint, Michigan, who wore out her siblings asking why. She describes learning, after being misquoted, to ask what a reporter is really asking. She calls listening a discipline she never mastered. And the question that carried her through divorce: what is this moment trying to teach me?

Crisis work as a puzzle solved with who, what, why, when, where, how. Mentoring as a two-way street. Why she always asked Howard Schultz why. Being the CEO of you. Owning Flint rather than letting others define it.

And her right now question: will we survive this chaos, and what can I do to help?

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#98 Ken Woodward: Paid To Say I Don't Know

" You do not knock on a door that's been painted over. One word scores the paint and reopens it." - Ken Woodward

Researchers paid people to admit when they didn't know something. Given access to AI advice, they almost never did.

The design made it startling. Participants could decline any question with no penalty. Guessing wrong cost them money. The AI advice they received was usually wrong. Every incentive pointed toward three simple words, and access to a machine nearly eliminated their willingness to say them.

What got suppressed wasn't accuracy. It was the willingness to be seen not knowing.

In this solo episode, Ken opens with a lie he told a friend in a room where nothing was at stake, then traces the same reflex through a sidewalk in Southeast D.C., five questions he couldn't answer, and a backyard conversation that ran five hours past its twenty-minute plan.

"I don't know" isn't a report on empty shelves. It's a doorway, and it's the only one.

What question are you avoiding because not knowing would cost you something?

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#97 Ken Woodward: The Last Time Was A Tuesday

"Every unasked question has an expiration date." - Ken Woodward

Ken tries to say goodbye to a shipmate before leaving the submarine. The man goes on emergency leave, and the goodbye has already happened without him noticing it. He had the calendar, the date, the list of names. The last one got past him anyway.

That is the shape of this episode. We do not know which time is the last time, and preparation does not change that. Ken walks through Tim Urban's arithmetic on parents, a return to his hometown that was supposed to be final and wasn't, and an upcoming lunch with his ninety-three-year-old aunt, who is the last door into a generation that has already closed. In Ambiguous Loss, Pauline Boss offers a useful frame: closure is largely a myth, and the real skill is holding something open without needing it to shut.

The question idea underneath it: every unasked question has an expiration date you cannot see. Some are saving for a better moment. Some you can't ask because you don't yet know you will want the answer.

Ken is recording before he flies, without a resolution, because the not knowing is the point.

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#96 Ken Woodward: A Slightly Smaller Life

"There is just a slightly smaller life that you experience as a completely normal one." - Ken Woodward

Seven experiments. Ten thousand people. Half learned a topic from an AI summary, half from ordinary web links. Same facts. The AI group came away with shallower knowledge, and when researchers propped the door open, placing live source links right beside the summary, almost nobody walked through.

Sixty-eight percent of Google searches now end without a click. With an AI Overview on the page, eighty-three percent.

This episode is about what that costs. Not wrong answers, wrong answers get caught. It's the second question that never gets asked, which leaves no error message and no gap in the record. Just a slightly smaller life that you experience as a completely normal one.

Then: a man on a corner in Northeast D.C. who gave me a name that wasn't his, and what it took to get the real one.

One more thing, I need your help naming something.

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#95 Dr. Lani Watson: Even Socrates Didn't Ask: On the Hidden Power of Questions

" This aporia, this state of confusion and bafflement, is actually a fantastically exciting, liberating, intellectually stimulating place to be because you're really facing something that you don't know that you thought you did." - Dr. Lani Watson

Dr. Lani Watson has spent her career on a question most of us never stop to ask. What is a question, and why does it hold such power?

Known online as The Questions Doctor, Lani is a philosopher and the author of Q: The Hidden Power of Questions in a World That Wants Answers. In this episode, we sit with the idea that questions are a kind of everyday magic. A power we all carry and rarely notice. They change our brains. They change our relationships. They shape the very answers we receive.

We talk about Socrates and the gift of not knowing. We talk about a world racing toward answers, and what we lose when we rush past the question. We talk about who gets to ask, and who does not.

Come sit with the questions a while. There is power in the asking, and it belongs to all of us.

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#94 Ken Woodward: The Station Never Called: The Listener's Question

"Listening is not real until the listener makes a sound back." - Ken Woodward

A sound-powered telephone runs on nothing but the sound of your own voice. No battery. No amplifier. I served on submarines, and I never forgot the joke we played on every new sailor: we sent him hunting the whole ship for batteries that do not exist. The power was in him the entire time. He only had to speak.

This is a solo episode about listening. About the repeat-back, the discipline of saying a message back until it lands correctly. About a 2025 study that found the follow-up question is the clearest sign that real listening is happening. About what Dr. Haru Yamada taught me, that to ask and to listen are one motion.

And it is about one officer I served with, a question I never asked him, and why I let it go unasked. The circuit is always live. Who is the station you have never called?

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#93 Ken Woodward: Built to Reach, Not to Catch

"Nothing in us reports on an absence. No creature ever needed a sense for the path it did not walk." - Ken Woodward

More than sixty percent of Google searches now end without a single click. We type the question, read the summary, and leave. The trip is gone.

Neuroscientist Anne-Laure Le Cunff argues that curiosity needs a gap to switch on, and that learning deepens while the question stays open. The answer closes the window.

But the reaching is not our failure. Wanting the missing piece is old equipment, and it worked well for a very long time, because you used to have to walk over the ridge to find out. What changed is the hit rate. We catch every time now, in three seconds, and the machinery on the other side never gets to run.

This week we look at which gaps are worth keeping open, why resistance is the mechanism rather than the toll, and what ten years of a daily question taught me about the limits of my own idea.

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#90 Ken Woodward: Right Now Questions - Union Market, DC: When Now Becomes Next

"When someone asks us about now, many of us answer with next." - Ken Woodward

We took the mic into Union Market and asked strangers one question. What is your Right Now Question? Their answers, and the quiet trend running underneath them.

On a warm June afternoon in Washington, DC, we stood in Union Market and asked the people passing through a single thing. Not what they do. Not where they are headed. Just this. What is your Right Now Question?

What came back was a market full of strangers, each one carrying something. A job. A move. A book they could not choose. A neighborhood changing faster than anyone can hold. Listen for the trend running underneath the answers, then meet us on the other side for what we noticed.

A few of the Right Now Questions we heard:

Am I going to get this job?
What does peace look like?
Do I stay, or do I go?
Do the new neighbors know what this used to be?
Where will these protests lead us?
What is so hard about being kind?

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#88 Ken Woodward: Learning to Be Asked

"Ian thought a question was a way to find out who was above him and who was below him. The fire taught him it was a way to find out who was beside him." - Ken Woodward

Ian told me he had gotten better at asking questions, and then said the thing that caught my attention. He used to be afraid to ask. Partially fear of looking nosy. Mostly afraid that asking one question,would open him up to being asked one back. I knew that fear from the inside, so the two of us got on a call to dig in.

This episode follows what we found. The scarcity in the house that raised him, and how a stretched mind cannot afford a question. The old wiring that treats being pushed out of the group as a threat to survival. Why his fear was not timidity but an accurate read of how people actually work. And the small weekly circle, built on one plain question, that changed the physics until the thing he feared was simply no longer true.

With a debt to Brian Fretwell and Finding Good, a nod to Seth Godin and Polly Wiessner, and a question at the end I do not have the answer to.

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#87 Ken Woodward: The Anatomy of a Question

"The question was not broken. It was unfinished." - Ken Woodward

Buried in the introduction of the twentieth century's most famously unread book is the most precise dissection of a question ever written.

In this solo episode, we open Martin Heidegger's Being and Time and recover his anatomy of inquiry: every question has a subject, a source, and an intent, and most questions fail not from bad wording but from missing parts.

We test the anatomy against the streets of Washington, D.C., including a backyard in Marshall Heights where a five-hour-and-forty-five-minute conversation revealed what sixty-one years of an unasked question feels like.

Then the reckoning. The man who drew the map of questioning joined the Nazi Party, deleted his Jewish teacher's name from his own dedication page, and spent forty-three years refusing the one question that came addressed to him.

Knowing the anatomy is not the asking. This episode is about the difference, and the drive home.

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#86 Ken Woodward: The Smallest Act of Authorship

"The smallest act of authorship is a question." - Ken Woodward

Nine months ago, Naomi Campbell of the Right Question Institute said one word that gave me a word I had been searching for: agency. I felt it land in my body before I understood it in my head. I promised my listeners I would come back with an answer. This episode is that answer.

Agency is the authorship of our own lives. Not control, which none of us has. Authorship is something smaller and more stubborn. It is the refusal to be only what the world wrote about us. And the smallest act of authorship, it turns out, is a question. The moment we ask, we stop receiving the world and start writing on it.

I carry two stories from my walk across Washington. A man I call Doc, raised by a mother who would not let him absorb anything without questioning it first. A woman I call Pearl, who answered the worst day of her life by building a neighborhood for the children coming up behind her.

Agency is inherent. It can be suppressed, but never removed. The whole question is whether we pick up the pen.

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#85 Larry Robertson: What Will You Soon Realize You Already Know?

" The more you play around with it, and the more you see the power in a question, the more you realize that it actually is the cure for the uncertainty that ails many of us." - Larry Robertson

Larry Robertson has spent three decades advising leaders on growth, innovation, and strategy. He is also a US Fulbright Scholar, a columnist, and the author of four award-winning books. His newest, Great Question: The Art of the Ask and Getting More of What You Really Want, draws on more than 140 interviews spanning neuroscience, psychology, business, and the arts.

Larry believes we are not a storytelling species. We are a questioning species. He arrived at that conviction book by book, pattern by pattern, over two decades of research.

In this conversation, we explore the power of questions as a form of agency. We examine intellectual humility and what happens when you stop performing certainty. We discuss leadership, polarization, and the Braver Angels framework. We also unpack Larry's five-element Art of the Ask.

Questions are not a technique. They are a behavior. They are something you already know how to do. This conversation is a reminder to start practicing again.

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#83 Ken Woodward: What You Know Changes What You Can Ask

"A good answer can close a loop. A good question opens one." - Ken Woodward

What if the quality of your questions has less to do with how curious you are and more to do with how much you know?

A recent study from the Technion in Israel tracked 68 students over a semester of Introduction to Psychology. Researchers measured not just what students learned, but how their question-asking changed. The findings are worth sitting with. Domain-specific questions got sharper, more original, more complex. General questions did not improve. In some cases, they declined.

Knowledge doesn't flatten curiosity. It sharpens it.

This episode traces that finding through 32 years of Navy acquisition, through 1,300 conversations on a 2,085-mile walk through Washington DC, and through a conversation with Seth Godin about tension, rubber bands, and the question that only becomes possible after the preparation is done.

The argument is simple. You don't become a better questioner by wanting to ask better questions. You become one by learning more about what you're walking into.

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#82 Ken Woodward: Who Told You That Was Good?

"My tree was planted in a metal bucket." - Ken Woodward

Some mornings, the ordinary holds the weight of everything. A walk to the garage. An attempt to correct a gait. A drift back to comfort. Ken opens this solo episode with that image and asks why returning to comfort is the default setting of an adult life.

Drawing on the work of Nigerian-born British photographer and activist Misan Harriman, Ken investigates the mourning that accompanies genuine personal growth. The mourning for the world you thought you believed in. The mourning for the person you were sure was good enough.

Ken traces his own reckoning through the identities that once added up to a clean equation. Each one a nutrient in the soil he was given. Each one another layer of metal on the bucket his tree was planted in. Growing. Just with no room to expand.

This episode is about noticing the bucket. Cracking it open. And dragging your roots toward soil that can actually hold them.

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#79 Andrew Caulk: Who Benefits From Me Believing This?

"It is easier simply to tell the truth, even if you've made a mistake, because what it does is build credibility over time." - Andrew Caulk

What happens when the questions leaders most need to ask are the ones they're most afraid to voice? Andrew Caulk spent two decades in the Air Force as an information strategist, and he's seen how institutions, military, political, and personal, manage their narratives by avoiding the hardest inquiries.

In this conversation, Andrew and Ken explore how misinformation and disinformation actually work, why truth is more strategically sustainable than deception, and how the attention economy is quietly rewiring our ability to think slowly.

Andrew shares what senior leaders refused to ask aloud in military war games, what the casualty projections for a Taiwan conflict actually look like, and why American will to fight may be the most underexamined variable in geopolitical strategy.

The conversation also turns to children, curiosity, and how the questions we allow, or suppress, in our homes shape the next generation's capacity to navigate a noisy world.

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